HW 47 Peer Perspectives on Care of The Dead

To help me understand the perspectives of the people around me regarding the care of the dead, I decided to interview my mother since I am very close to her. The first question that I asked her was "How are dead people cared for in America?" She responded by saying "I mean, when I think of people dying, funeral and planning is the first thing that pops into my head. For me funerals are just as stressful as the grieving. Funeral planning and dealing with the will interferes with my grieving and makes the situation worse than it should be." This was an interesting response, because wills had never even crossed my mind. That's probably because I don't know to much about them. When I asked about my mothers experience with the care of the dead, she said that she had been to 7 funerals in her life. Six of these were in our family. My mom is in her mid 40's so I'm not sure if 7 funerals is average or not. I'm guessing she went to one almost once a decade. That's not to bad right? My mother was close to basically everyone of the family funerals since they were her grandparents, her aunts, her brothers(which was the hardest for us both), and her mother.Finally, I asked her about the different methods of dealing with bodies that she was aware of, and which way she would prefer for herself. "Abdul I want you to cremate me and either throw my ashes over the ocean or keep them in your house. I don't want you to have to deal with the funeral arrangements."

The next person I spoke to was my godmother, who I am quite close to since she lives down the hall. Our experiences with the care of the dead are very much alike since she went to my grandmothers funeral. When I asked her what she has noticed about the care of the dead, she said, " There is usually an awake a day or two before the actual funeral which is usually at a funeral home . I'm not really sure why that is but I always go to both. Then there is the day of the funeral which is usually at a church. Afterwards the family and friends are usually picked up in a limo and driven to the burial site where there is another small service." I thought this response was very interesting because not once did I hear anything about cremation. It certainly seems as though cremation is much more rare than a funeral burial. But why I ask myself why? ". I think being buried is better than being cremated because at least when your buried your remains mix with the Earth as they begin to decay. I like to think of it as "giving back". 

The last person that I decided to interview was my godmothers son who is 19. I kind of wanted to see if he would have similar or different opinions than his mother. After asking how he felt about the way the dead are cared for in America today, he responded, "Funerals are slowly changing, people are beginning to look at them differently as if their negative occasions. Funerals are supposed to be about the celebrating of the life of the deceased ." I mean funerals will always be a sad place for people as long as they are genuinely sad with the death of their loved ones but, there really should be more after occasion celebrations."The last question I asked him was if he would prefer a cremation or a burial for himself. I had to prompt him with a straightforward question since he was beginning to get off topic and beat around the bush. " I would definitely want to be buried because I want people to come and celebrate my life together. One thing I like about funerals is they really can bring people together and unite them as one.That's what I love."

Each of the three people I chose to interview had a unique element to give to me. Many of these ideas were still quite similar and mixed with hand in hand with some of my own opinions. It's always fun to do this homework assignments because I get to peer into societies mind and figure out what they think and what they know.